Ashby Facts


mrs. ashby:

1. she is afraid of the dark. like, turn-on-every-light-in-the-house-that-she-passes-on-the-way-to-the-bedroom afraid of the dark. devin trails behind, turning them all back off, usually mocking her.
2. she loves any and every reason to celebrate.
3. she despises going under the speed limit. DESPISES.
4. she can hardly handle "medium" salsa. devin says he will ween her onto spicy foods eventually.
5. she once broke her foot by tripping. over absolutely nothing. mind you, this was in 2009. when she was 18. a grown adult.
6. she only wears stud/post earrings.
7. she can only fall asleep on her right side.
8. she loves clothes but is not too fond of shopping, which makes it a little harder. and even though her side of the closet could eat devin's in no time flat, she complains frequently about having nothing to wear and asks devin pick out her outfits on a regular basis.
9. she never goes without painted toes (she's also a poet. obviously.)
10. french fries are her kryptonite. also, the downeast catalog, which typically has every page dog-earred within 15 minutes of receiving it in the mail.
11. she was in a commercial.
12. in high school, she had a very embarrassing reaction to almonds, so she's pretty sure she's allergic to them. she never went to a doctor about it, so she's really not positive, but she avoids them. although... almonds in chocolate and almond milk don't seem to affect her. which only leaves her more confused, and still too afraid to try almonds again.
13. the first thing she does when she comes home from work (usually regardless of what plans she has later that night) is change into sweats. indubitably.
14. she has a scar on her ring finger that is usually hidden by her wedding ring. it was also caused by her wedding ring. there's also a mole there.
15. they've lived in their house for over 10 months and she still doesn't know which light switch turns on which light.
16. she thinks she's a horrible driver. and even worse are her parking skills (or lack thereof...)
17. she loves to read. but if the book doesn't have a cool cover (yes. she judges that.) or it doesn't grab her attention in the first 3 chapters, or it's not recommended by someone she thinks is awesome and trustworthy with book recommendations, it's a lost cause and will find it's way back to the shelf where it will collect dust and make her book collection appear more substantial. and that's all it will ever accomplish in it's life in her ownership.
18. she gets insecure when devin reads over her shoulder as she's blogging, or if he reads it when she's around. she's so weird.
19. sometimes when she thinks of witty things, she writes them down so she can tweet them later.
20. she still goes to the same doctor who delivered her. and he doesn't even seem that old. or look that old. but he's probably really old. maybe she should find a new doctor...
21. she is scared of blow-drying her hair when she's home alone.
22. she uses devin's business cards as bookmarks.
23. she gets illegitimately upset when she smells someone else wearing Devin's cologne. and also, mildly confused...
24. she's a horrible liar.
25. she hates potatoes in any form. except french fries. she loves french fries.



mr. ashby:

1. he is really good at sound effects. all of them. (most of them)
2. he rarely remembers to close the lid on the washer after he starts a load of laundry. (resulting in a lot of loads soaking in the soapy water for endless hours. but hey, it can only make them cleaner, right?)
3. he can quote the majority of the episodes of The Office flawlessly. also, Dumb and Dumber.
4. he never cooks with a recipe.
5. more often than not, he is referred to by others as Dash or Dashby. some people don't even know his real name.
6. he is an impulsive grocery shopper.
7. he is a professional air-drummer. his stage is the car.
8. he used to be a certified water specialist (serious. it's a thing.)
9. he loves to do what he calls "come home from work and watch the rednecks work on discovery channel"
10. he loves pickles on his hot dogs.
11. he has this uncanny ability to brush things off his shoulder. to not let things get to him. to shrug and move on. it's awesome.
12. he could eat wing nutz every single day and never get sick of it, and probably be at least 25% happier in general with that addition in his life.
13. he loves to vacuum. mostly for the lines in the carpet.
14. it's possible that he could be spiderman. if you saw him rock climb, you would understand.
15. he loves lighthouses. (it's a new england thing)
16. he doesn't like to chew gum.
17. he actually doesn't know one single fact about bear attacks.
18. he was in a commercial, too. and on a billboard.
19. he probably makes a bed better than any hotel housekeeper.
20. he loves blue cheese. loves.
21. he isn't very good at poker.
22. he talks really loud when he is on the phone.
23. he hates tomatoes.
24. he collects vintage cameras.
25. he only likes dark chocolate. like, really dark. like, 80% cacao dark.

together:

1. they have so many strange things in common, but still didn't meet until 2010 at a mutual friend's wedding reception, for which devin was the photographer.
2. they can have entire conversations consisting solely of quotes from The Office, which usually confuses everyone around them, which makes it funnier.
3. sometimes, the reach of their spontaneity only goes as far as a late night run to taco bell for a bag full of assorted tacos and burritos. which is spontaneous enough for them. sometimes.
4. they love washing their cars.
5. they order pizza at least 3 times a month. the same every time: a medium hawaiian bbq chicken pizza and 10-inch cheesy breadsticks from Papa John's. and it's delicious.
6. at least once a day, one of them will randomly text the other a quote from the office. or a quote from themselves. they crack themselves up.
7. they spend countless hours looking at floor plans for houses online on a regular basis.
8. their middle names are katie's parent's first names. ironically.
9. they want dogs. probably more than they want kids at this point. and 2 dogs. because they can't decide on just one breed to have. they can't agree, either.
10. they love reese's peanut butter cups.
11. they watch, on average, 2 episodes of The Office each night before bed.
12. they rarely eat at their dining room table. maybe they forget it's there? the coffee table is where it's at.
13. they deliberately left their own reception half an hour early.
14. their favorite movie is "The Town"
15. they collect Middle Kingdom vases.
16. their outfits often match on accident. 
17. they never sent out "thank you" cards after their wedding, because they didn't want to. which might make them bad people, but they are still thankful.
18. they buy lots of different kinds of milk. 1%, skim, soy, almond, organic, coconut...
19. they don't like orange juice. unless they're sick.
20. their bedroom is yellow.
21. they are 4 years apart.
22. neither of them like deviled eggs.
23. they went to rivaling high schools, but at different times.
24. they have both owned at one time in their life, a Dodge Neon.
25. they owned 4 different cars over the first year of their marriage.

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